Once again Eastleigh over 50’s have failed to confirm our ‘friendly’ for next Thursday, as this is the 3rd time they have run scared, we will take the victory and keep our 100% record intact. I feel we need a nickname for Eastleigh, answers on a postcard please.
I noted this week the BBC and SKY heavily reporting ‘100 days to go’ I found this quite perplexing as it’s actually 38 days to go until our first major tournament on March 8th.
The news from Westleigh Park, a very sombre atmosphere presides over our hallowed club after the disgraceful antics of Concord Rangers whose players all regularly attend RADA sessions with back up training from Tom Daley. And I daren’t even mention the officials who were either on the Concord payroll or completely bereft of any football knowledge.
Once again we are 14; we had 2 missing this week, Jeff the Influential who was unavailable due to an exam for his BTEC in flower pressing (good luck Jeff) and also Rob the Fit who was undergoing a full body wax, not his usual back, sack and crack!
As we arrive at Southdown’s on a bitter and bleak morning, the hot bloodied males of the squad were steaming in anticipation; the ‘Special One’ was on form with the pre warm up comedy, vaguely reminiscent of ‘Basil Brush’ BOOM BOOM Galesy.
After a brief but telling warm up, which we all managed without any of the normal faux pas, the teams were selected, and this week we had the 7 boisterous blues v the 7 voracious vivids, the seen was set for another memorable contest.
With all the players now knowing their positions some great pairings are being forged, notably George the Safe with great foresight working well with Joe the Mighty, mighty in stature, mighty in skill, also noted were some great defensive partnerships Stewart the Voice a stalwart in any defence linking effortlessly with The Yeti a towering presence with a deft touch, the pace was electric with the vivids going one nil up early on, the match nip and tuck all the way, we must applaud the great touch of Mo the Polite perhaps cheer at the ability of The Wok ( who whilst in goal got tangled in the net, once again alerting the college to cries of Harpoon), we must cheer in awe at the delightful control offered by Pete the Fast who I must say was controversially allowed to remain on the pitch after a blatant hand ball which would have led to Matt being able to miss again. The link up play between Dave the Rave storming up front and the incredible Tony the Wall was well worth the entrance fee. Please raise your glass to the quiet yet bloody good Dave SBD, and a toast to the ever agile and proactive Clive the Nimble, and a cheer goes up to the talent and flair offerd by John the Nipper. Now at this point I have to relinquish my title for at least this week to Paul, who takes the title of Paul the Miss, as he was a yard out on an empty goal and sent the tap in wide………. UNBELIEVABLE, Matt the Miss continued to miss but had a few on target, yet after the very political week in the news Matt will be known as Matt le Pen wide on the right wing. A very tight match from start to finish, with a final score of 3-2 to the Vivids.
A few final items, we have been informed the FA’s health and safety guidelines require ALL players to wear pads, the extra absorbent ones are on special offer at ASDA 2 packs for a tenna.
Although our squad is made up of fit and talented veterans a further training session has been organised for a Monday evening, I will not divulge the time or place due to being overwhelmed with national and international paparazzi.
In the transfer market the ‘Special One’ has been quite crafty and sent out the Yeti on loan to The Sydney Seniors’ for a month to learn any antipodean techniques, we will miss you YETI.
And finally, with commitment peaking in the team and an increasing number of crunching tackles, we warn our future opponents to beware, casualties this week included a near break to the ankle of Dave the Nipper, and a blood injury to Clive the Nimble as he took out two players.
I finish on a thank you to my fellow oldies, it’s a pleasure and a privilege to train and play each week, we have a great coach, top class facilities, and obviously the BEST team on the south coast, hope to see you all Monday.
), there are contact details for four Walking Football teams they are "supporting", including us. The others are the Saturday South Downs one, Horndean, and Emsworth. Contact details are there, got to be worth having a local tournament between these four teams? If people want me to, I'll contact the other three and see if we can come up with some sort of tournament to find out which of them is the second best WF team in the Havant area. 
